Doctor, Lawyer, Indian Chief

Do you remember this childhood rhyme?
      Rich Man, Poor Man,

Beggar Man, Thief,

Doctor, Lawyer, 

Indian Chief.

For some reason it came to mind when I was trying to think of a subject for this post.  :)  

This is what I feel like now...lawyer- or at least crafty when dealing with the insurance.  Doctor, nurse and everything else.  I've been reading other blogs and I realize this is NORMAL.  But it's tiring.  I feel like I'm on a tightrope because Katie is 18 and an adult and she's obviously wanting to be treated like an adult.  But is it wrong of me to want to make sure she has everything she needs?  She was going to a friend's house tonight and I tried about 20x to get her to agree to have the friend here.  She KNEW why I was doing it and pushed back equally as hard.  I had to literally bite my tongue when I asked her final plans and she said that he was picking her up here and bringing here to hang out at his place.  Now I'm sitting here trying NOT to obsessively text her over and over.  I'm trying guys.  I'm human though.

Case in point. Yesterday she was getting ready for work and I let her figure out what she needed. I believe I even asked as she was flying out the door if she had everything she needed.  Then she texted me she had NO snack with her.  You have to understand - she and I live by her meals.  She has to - literally.  Especially when working and doing physical activity - her numbers drop too low.  But I just told her to go to Target next door and get a snack.  And honestly- she figured it out.  Her best friend Mel was heading up there and was able to get her a snack.  I wasn't trying to be unfeeling but she has to learn.  I won't always be there for her and that kills me.  It's why I wish unrealistically that she had gotten diagnosed when she was little.  I feel like it's SO much harder to have a new adult be diagnosed.  As if she doesn't have enough to be responsible for???

So..I let her go today...I have texted her a few times and she is understanding more that I need to hear from her.  Need a text with her bs numbers.  And once in awhile..her lows are low and she gets freaked and asks to sleep with me and I gladly make room in the bed for her.....gladly....

This disease scares the heck out of me.  I think because I want to be in control all the time and it feels like we are falling down the rabbit hole.

I know more about carb counting and insulin amounts and things I never signed up for.  For those who know me- I was a creative person.  Trained originally years ago to be an elementary school teacher.  Went on to own a scrapbook store but when that store failed in the economy I did something so drastic my close friends and family (but not Kevin..he always knew or believed in me) thought I had lost it.  I went back to get a degree in Science.  I don't know if Kevin was rubbing off on me or what, but when he asked me what I wanted to do - that is what I said- BIOLOGY.  I believe we are on this path due to fate or whatever and this obviously was something I started studying for a reason a few years ago.  Little did I know it would be to help my daughter stay healthy and live a long life!  

I'm so glad I paid so close attention in all my courses..I know more about our cells and how they work from even before this disease....time to close down for the night...think it's about time to text my oldest.  I'm sure she will forgive me.  I always was a mama bear when someone was poking my kids..it's amazing to me how much like the mom in Steel Magnolias I can be when pushed....I'll do anything to make sure my daughter is ok.  Even if it means incurring her wrath for texting her numerous times in a night.  One day when she has a child she will get it!